Who am I?

Who am I? The wearer of many hats?

Odd...this morning while commenting on a post on another Blogger site I was asked who I was commenting as. Er....me? Got me thinking about who I am. One of those random thoughts I like to play with. At the best of times I'm someone who is a bit hopeless with media - mobiles, Blogger (don't get me started on WordPress which defeats me). And then there are things called Facetime, SnapChat and What'sApp. My eldest son despairs of me - he who builds computer from scratch having learnt how to do it just by watching YouTube videos.

I only know I'm one up on people when I say something they don't understand and then for a moment I feel quite elated. I have been accused of never having my mobile on by both family and friends (hubby is far worse - he often forgets to take his phone with him).

For a writer I feel I should be good with social media (and to be fair I did set up my blogs totally alone as techie son never uses them so couldn't help...yay!). I am on Facebook but am choosy who I friend. You would laugh if you saw how little my friend tally is, but that's how I want it (this is my personal Facebook page. I don't yet have a writer page). I do use Twitter (off and on) and recently I started posting to Instagram. Here I asked my younger son (sporty) to give me some instruction in this as I only set up an account originally to follow him when he went on his travels.

So, we have established I am not exactly great at tech and media. But I will say about me is that I never stop learning. I will often ignore things for as long as possible until I see the need to grasp it, or my interest is piqued, and then I wade in with enthusiasm and completely cobble things up until I get the hang of it.

Years ago I'd say I was someone who started many things and never finished any of them. Then one day I looked at the scattered half begun projects and never completed courses and thought 'this is not good enough'. I know I often take on too many new things so that my time is stretched and giving my full attention to one never quite happens. This is partly down to the fact that I get bored easily. I crave variety. It's why I only belong to only one choir even though I've had opportunities to join others. I will do one-off sessions for the Big Sing because that's just a day. I enjoy days spent walking, taking photos, visiting art exhibitions, meeting friends, playing short tennis, and of course writing. I love variety in my week.

When I had paid work (I have the luxury of not having to do that now) I often found myself staring out of windows wishing I was somewhere else, jotting down poems on odd bit of paper. I did office work for all my working life and was happiest when I could leave my desk and do some photocopying or fill in on reception. I suppose that's why I also to do other silly things at work (and I'm sure I've said this before) like write a serial and sticking each episode up where the drinks machine was for the staff to read.  It was always funny and my characters had names like Ivan Idea (the inventor) or Ivy Leaves (the florist). I also wrote songs about the staff, especially the bosses. I play guitar (badly) and I'd record the songs onto cassette (remember those?) and they would circulate between the secretaries and typing staff. They loved them! Those tapes went missing never to be seen again.

I think if I had to say who I am I'd say I'm someone who likes to entertain (which goes totally against my shy/anxious default setting). I particularly enjoy making people laugh. I like writing funny things, but lately I have also been exploring the dark side to see how far I can go. I enjoy challenges and trying new genres to write in. I think, because of my make-up, I'd hate to be classed as a writer of one genre. I need to go off and write something totally different, to switch between poetry and flash, to write the odd song lyric and dabble in longer fiction. I will never say never about anything in life because situations change, and I know from personal experience that I have been led to things I would never have considered when I was younger. Perhaps that is down to being older and having gained life experience. I am also drawn to the unusual and writing about taboo subjects.

Writing is something I do everyday in one form or another, whether it's writing a letter (yes, I still do write actual letters and love receiving them in the post), blogging or writing new poetry or stories, as well as editing current and older material. Along with that goes reading and music. I'm listening to music as I write this (Must Beautiful Chillout Ambient & Deep Trance Music Mix on YouTube). I have playlists I use for certain pieces of writing and often have them on loop.

And now I can't remember what I intended to write in this post! I'm sure I hadn't intended to waffle on like this. However, I am aware that my recent posts have all been book reviews, and I just wanted to let you know that I am still writing and having plenty of mulling time. I kept myself awake the other night living through next scenes of a short story (could be a potential novella) I'm writing. Actually, I'm finding writing longer stories at around 20,000 - 25,000 words works for me. The trouble is there is little outlet for these. I have three or four mainly dystopian, paranormal or strange occurrence stories as well as one romantic horror (is that even a proper genre?)

Well, that's me. At least today! And here is my current must play every day track at the moment:

Distractions...or what stops me writing!

We all have them, those distractions, excuses etc., that stop us from writing. My problem is that I indulge in too many things, over commit myself and begin then to wear down.

If anyone who reads this also reads my other blog you will know that I am attending several courses both online and at a London College which have nothing to do with writing at all. Then there are my regular classes, sport on a Friday (I'll be off shortly!) and singing in Euphonix Community Choir on Wednesdays.. Occasionally these things clash, say when a concert comes up on a Friday. This is happening in two weeks time and though I will really miss playing my sport, my music comes first.

If I had to list my main interests in life - those I couldn't live without - it would be music, writing, reading (but there are so many offshoots from these!) I guess I could live without playing sport, but I've played some sport practically all my life and when I had to give up for a while through injury it was a awful. I've been back playing for about two years now and hope to go on well into my senior years.

But back to writing. I have actually put a great deal of work 'out there' this month and I am beginning to edit my story. Yet I know I have over committed myself with all these other courses and I am really looking forward to half term when only choir will meet. I guess having an inquiring mind is good for a writer. Certainly some of my other interests have produced a piece of writing, or given me ideas for writing but I find a new interest exciting and these then send out little threads to possible new fields of study, either within an interest category or a completely new one. (I forgot to mention my interest in art history - all those galleries and exhibitions to see.....it never ends!).

I've always had these interests but since the early 2000's these interests have taken off, by which I mean I want to study them. Blame the Open University....that was the start of it all! My writing has also always been there but again I began taking it more seriously around the same time, so now all my interests are competing! However, I'd say that writing was the very first interest I had as a teenager.....ooo actually music was there too. I was writing lyrics at a young age!  Oh heck, when I think about it sport was the only thing I enjoyed at school. I was good at running and netball.  You see? However, I am a late developer. Having left school at fifteen I am now finding a passion for learning.

I feel I am rambling now! At the moment I have an idea for a series of poems, perhaps to work towards a pamphlet. Despite all these other distractions I am finding some time to write. Of course I haven't even started on the everyday distractions of housework and the aimless doing nothing while trying to work out what to do! Also at the moment I am running a short Bible study group for our Mothers' Union branch which means a period of preparation for me and hosting the small group one evening a week. My diary is pretty packed up until almost Easter but I bet I'll be fitting something else in if I can, even when I say I won't!

One thing is for sure, my life is never dull and everything I learn can be used somewhere in the lines of a poem or story. I'm going now......yes really......I have badminton and short tennis courts waiting for me and as I'm going to have to miss a few weeks I want to make the most of it!