The good, the bad and the ugly

I have a new sub-folder in my writing folder. This one is called New Poems 2020, and I'm really pleased. In the last two weeks I have been struggling with lockdown. Just when things seem to be easing, my tunnel has appeared longer.

I've tried to work out why I feel this way. These are the conclusion I have come to:

1. Because I don't do Zoom I suppose I feel more isolated from my friends
2. Although some restrictions have eased they haven't benefitted me. Those with cars can now drive out to places. Without a car I rely on public transport, which we are told to avoid. Therefore, I feel I am missing out.
3. The things that I most want to do are still unavailable - museums, art galleries, historic houses.
4. The weather can change how I feel

Being outside really helps me. It is where I relax and find peace, so walking is high on my agenda. But I have exhausted the nearest green spaces. To find others I have to walk several miles before I can embrace the green. For a while I was in a dark place but there is now talk of how museums might operate, so I keep up to date with that waiting for the green light.  That's a lot of green!

My one, no two life saving things right now is poetry and art, oh and music - that's three, and this line is starting to sound like a Monty Python sketch!

I had written a couple of new poems and realised I missed writing my one-a-day-poem-for-a-year. This time I'm not purposely setting out a commitment to write everyday for a year. Just to try and write something each day, but no pressure to do so. Luckily, I have hit one of those rare writing splurges. Some of the poems have been quite desparate 'lockdown' poems, but others not. I have been reading The Forward Book of Poetry 2019 and the Brotherton Prize Anthology of Poetry (judged by Simon Armatage). Here I have found inspiration (as well as wondering what some poems were actually about!). I am now reading Gerard Manley Hopkins, whose poetry style I find intriguing and sometimes try to emulate. I already have twenty-five new poems in my new folder (that shocked me when I went to count them). Of course, some won't see the light of day, some are personal and some were just fun to write. But I am pleased with quite a few, and I have time to spend going over them, so they are not such raw first drafts.

Art-wise I spent an hour yesterday morning drawing a plan of the park where I jog to show the progress I have made since I first began running back in March. And I also made paper girls to support #ListenToGirls for World Refugee Day on Saturday. Art comes in all shapes and sizes whether it is a not-to-scale park map, paper girls or a pen and ink drawing. I have to say I loved drawing the map!

Music is with me constantly. Right now I'm listening to a YouTube Mix, and I mostly write to music. I listen to music while I iron (singing and dancing with an iron can be tricky!). Oh, and I finished my online songwriting course. I learned a lot, especially how much a technophobe I am. Lots of other students recorded their songs with professional sounding music software. I was struggling with Audacity just to record voice and a badly played guitar! But other students were very kind to me. I am now considering which free music software to download to use at my leisure. They all look so complicated and I'm dithering. The one everyone raves about is GarageBand, but I don't have a Mac or Ipad, so it is of no use to me.

So, there we have it, a mixed bag. Keep writing. Keep reading (another life-saver - that's four things!)

Here is my song (words and music by me). Hope this link works. Sorry about the low sound.

https://soundcloud.com/heather01-1/small-town