Thinking aloud

I had a plan to work on my novel yesterday but I could not bring myself to write. Instead I spent a quiet day doing bits and pieces. I baked biscuits and froze them ready for Christmas, I looked up a few writing/author websites, followed one and ordered a magazine to get an idea of what sort of stories they publish before either/or subscribing/submitting. I also looked into a poetry competitions at a local library which a friend had reminded me about. I've had some success here before. Their theme is light, so much the reverse of what happened in Paris on Friday. I have one poem which might fit the bill but I managed to put another poem together (it felt good to be writing something full of light and hope) which I am now 'sitting on' for a while to see I am happy with it.

I spent a lot of the day reading and about two hours sleeping. Though I sometimes take a ten minute nap after lunch, this longer sleep was unusual. But then it was an unusual sort of day.

At church this morning our vicar's sermon concentrated on the events of yesterday particularly on fear (which these mad men and women want us to feel). Worrying never gains you any extra days of life, and fear restricts and changes you. This is so right. All of us spend time worrying about things which might happen. What do we gain from it? Nothing, only stress which leads to health problems. I know I am worrier by nature, yet I know it's crazy and I tell myself this. Still, it's hard to break the habit of a lifetime!

We were reminded this morning that what Paris experienced on Friday night happens daily in other countries -  a lot of which does not get reported and we are less likely to be affected because it has happened further away. A sobering thought.

After the bombings in London some years ago, I was determined to continue going to London and doing what I wanted. Of course, it crossed my mind as I took tubes trains that something that might happen. In fact had that incident happened a week earlier, I might well have been on that tube with my brother.

My youngest son is going to the football match between England and France this week at Wembley. There was talk of it being cancelled, but it will now go ahead. It will be on my mind as he goes off with his friend. I won't feel happy until he is back. But I feel this whenever he goes off abroad on his own (he recently went to South Korea and before that Barcelona). He loves to travel and why not?

Already things are circulating on Facebook about Muslims and the call to close Mosques. I get very angry when people start their hate campaigns. Muslims are horrified by what happened in France and the terrorists were indiscriminate - Muslims were killed along with others. Those who bandy this stuff about are ignorant and prejudiced. There have been fanatical religious people since time began and Christians did their fair share of it too. There will always be weirdos like this. We cannot base a religion on one group of crazy terrorists. This is not religion, its is just an excuse to wage war and create fear. They will not win. Hatred and violence never wins - only love wins. It is stronger and has a pure heart.