Friday, 20 February 2015

Writing 201: Day 4

Today I have been working on a Elegy on the theme of fog. I'm not sure what I have written quite works. Maybe there is too much tied up in it. I believe there may be a stress pattern to elegies but I always abuse those! I use my ear to hear how lines work but mix it up. The prompt looked a metaphor. I use metaphor quite a lot but I don't think there is one in my poem as such this time. I struggled for inspiration with this and I'm not that happy with the result. Maybe one day I'll take it apart and re-write it in a different form. I looked at not having end rhymes but they seemed to naturally want to be written that way. So here is my flimsy effort for today:


Boundaries shift losing their edges
Eyes strain to see ahead
All points of reference disappear
Under a smoky bed.

Movement slows, cars are nose to tail
Break lights blink off and on
Headlights beam as if they’re searching
Sucked in trails, there, then gone.

All is grey, swirling dense and cloying
Changing whole perspectives
Horns beep out in great frustration
The fog ignores and drifts.

Nothing looks the same anymore
Blind is the traveller now
All reason and logic come undone
This is nature’s power.

Our instincts for time and space is lost
With ancestors long gone
Clocks and technology run our lives
Without them we are done.

Man made machines point the way for us
Our brains are dull as fog
Hooked and wired to get our daily dose
Just another dim cog.

Take away the safety nets and breathe
Find your natural rhythm
Nature gave you all you’d ever need
Become nature driven.

Undo the restraints that keep you bound
This life belongs to you
But only you can change the pathway

Do what you need to do.

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